Error loading page.
Try refreshing the page. If that doesn't work, there may be a network issue, and you can use our self test page to see what's preventing the page from loading.
Learn more about possible network issues or contact support for more help.

President Me

The America That's in My Head

ebook
1 of 1 copy available
1 of 1 copy available

My fellow Americans,

President John F. Kennedy once famously said, "Hey, is that blond intern eighteen yet?" He also said, "Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country."

We've changed a lot since JFK asked us all to pitch in. We've become a nation of narcissistic, yoga-mat-toting, service-dog-having, absentee dads and gluten-free, hand-wringing, hypochondriac moms of overcaffeinated (yet somehow still lazy) twerking tweens. And our government is an inept bureaucracy incapable of doing anything except getting in our wallets and in our way.

We've got to get it together, America.

That is why I, Adam Carolla, hereby declare myself Candidate Carolla. The tome you hold in your hands is a statement of my intent to whip our country back into fighting shape, to eliminate the "what are you going to do for me?" mentality that has invaded our country.

President Me is my manifesto, my vision for a better place . . . free of Big Government, barefoot fliers, lazy hipsters who'd rather "Occupy" than work, and the other things that are bringing our country down. With my cabinet appointees, my list of worthy and necessary presidential ManDates, and tons of great ideas for fixing our health care, education, energy, and even national parks systems . . . behold an America we can be proud of. The America I see in my head.

You're welcome in advance.

Your future leader,
Adam

  • Creators

  • Publisher

  • Awards

  • Release date

  • Formats

  • Languages

  • Reviews

    • Publisher's Weekly

      June 30, 2014
      Comedian Carolla delivers the down and dirty about who is really at fault for the country’s woes and how he would fix things were he president. He airs traditional conservative views, as well as his own wish list of inane and amusing changes to the country he wants to improve, such as turning lanes in California and strip clubs. As a TV show and podcast host, he is, for the most part, a perfect narrator. He nails the punch lines and knows how to keep his voice interesting. There are parts of the recording where Carolla goes off script, ad-libbing riffs off his own material, which is one of the perks of the audio edition; however, it is not always clear if he is going off script intentionally or stumbling. Fans of the Adam Carolla Show podcast will enjoy all his performance has to offer, but those unfamiliar with him are not likely to be as easily enthralled. An IT Books hardcover.

    • Kirkus

      May 1, 2014
      Outspoken comedian, podcaster and TV host Carolla (Not Taco Bell Material, 2012) presents a mock presidential bid to "make this country better."Hypothesizing a run for the Oval Office as an anti-big-government candidate with a "common-man touch," Carolla offers a satirical, potty-mouthed blueprint on how contemporary America-a country he feels is being destroyed by overcaffeinated "pervasive narcissism"-could run more efficiently. Categorized by departments of the federal government, his pragmatically imagined "Carolla administration" would naturally solve a cavalcade of vexing predicaments by axing the bumbling office of vice president, repairing the economy by defusing overregulation-he uses the limited distribution of his own "Mangria" wine product as an example-and courtesy-policing lawless air travel ("we're getting fatter by the day...and ruder. This is a terrible combination, especially in a flying tin can"). With equal ire, the author gets fired up over vanity plates, NASA, and the mannerless, inappropriate morons hijacking the general population. A spoofed address to the United Nations General Assembly attacks a ministry of global leaders on their crappy performance records ("get your shit together"). But Carolla is an equal opportunity offender who throws the gauntlet down where he sees fit, regardless of affronting the audience. His rants and solutions may be cutthroat and often sophomoric, but they're also relatable and sure to echo the sentiments of many Americans-hence, his popularity as a social commentator. A modern-day Andy Rooney, Carolla, informed by pre-fame years working at McDonald's and odd construction jobs, skewers the American way of life while pitching bitchy asides at every turn.Carolla's sharp-edged and occasionally curmudgeonly observations will be an acquired taste for many, but initiated fans will endorse his amusing candidacy.

      COPYRIGHT(2014) Kirkus Reviews, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

Formats

  • Kindle Book
  • OverDrive Read
  • EPUB ebook

Languages

  • English

Loading